That's why girls suck all the time. Blah blah nag nag drama drama buy me things but I won't touch your penis
Hey when you come over to pick me up in the mornin bring a camera. This is going to be legendary. Don't knock.... They might cover up
My scrabble letters just formed failure. Thanks God.
She's like a pop up book from hell.
New York to be Host to America’s Biggest Singles Event
HE HAS A CHODE. LIFE IS NOT GOING TO BE EASY FOR HIM.
I only want to make out with him. Unless I get hungry. In that case I will take him home and screw him as a distraction from eating.
Haha, you avoided her at all costs. And then she shoved her tits in your face
Tell Taylor to rock on. Tell her she is so beautiful that the sun shines down on her face and shows her beauty. Tell her to live on, like Martin Luther King. He'll never die. He's living his dreams.
why can't I meet attractive men at the places I like to hang out? like books a million. or the liquor store.
Kylie Jenner Wasn’t in the Kardashian X-Mas Cards & the Internet is Losing it
True. So did you hook up with pasta or the ultimate warrior
Little bit of both
Maybe I'm nitpicking, but that looked more like how one would jerk off an elephant than it did playing air guitar.
I might stash a bottle of vodka in your mailbox, that way if I wanna leave early I can drink in your frontyard till you get back.
Went out with the family last night and some 40 yr old lady wanted to take me home. My mom was not happy with me
Just puked in a cup. Poured it out the window.
I'm touching everything in your apartment with my penis.