So it's 10:55am and I just woke up on the floor in the hallway on the4th floor. There should probably be no moredrinking competetions.
You want looks pregnant, is pregnant, or the one with a kid.
While I'm in the bathroom taking a piss you think of a way to get us the hell out of here.
We George Forman grilled some girls phone last night.
When did we start counting Thursdays as weekends?
When we got our fake ids in grade 11, why?
I just feel like it's time to start counting wednesdays as well...
Girl next to me in class just said to her friend "and I haven't even cried yet." Challenge accepted
we're stoned watching those roller coaster simulators w our hands up screaming on our couch
Let me shower first- i smell like sex and rock climbing (not so sure how that happened)
I totally just somersaulted to the bathroom to avoid moving out of my fetal position
I don't know if I should be concerned or impressed.
Note to self, stop going out with self absorbed bisexuals
Everyone loves nachos, first of all. Second, Ke$ha is entirely appropriate for the age grou too young to realize she probably has Hep C.
Why did this happen to me why did I have to meet him if I could go back in time I never would have grabbed his dick
So the next time I call you and say I'm going to my first strip club because it's christmas eve eve, and have work the next morning, I'd appreciate you stopping me
I'm in a corner eating carrots and drinking champagne. I've hit a new kind of low.
How is that low? I love carrots.
I know I say this every year but 2015 will be the year I finally have sex with David's sister
I am mildly hung over. Decided pants are very unnecessary right now.
Randomize
