Dual....:-)
i have accomplished my summer goal of being able to relate to every taylor swift song
Don't pass out before midnight like you did last year. See how much your year sucked
We discussed our relationship status. We're dating exclusively. And the conversation was followed by him saying "C'mon baby, let's make you orgasm!" .....I'm gonna marry him.
This morning I learned I traded my sunglasses for a Big Lebowski sticker at the football game.
Yea, you were talking about how you did not want to be a reindeer for at least 5 minutes.
My apartment smells like a lavender field inside of a giant bong.
One of the art pieces was basically this chick throwing raw meat at the audience, anyone who got hit (which I did) got a free shot of whiskey. It was worth it.
We're going to work out tomorrow I guess but it usually consists of doing weights for 10 minutes, then saying fuck cardio and going to Taco Tuesday
shotgunning beer in rite aid bathroom. hurry
After a little too much, I decided public urination was a constitutional right.. Nearly got deported for that one
you know i have almost 1500 fb friends but not ONE drunk booty call?
I'm sorry I tried to stab you. I just really wanted those mozerella sticks.
I thought if I bought the most expensive pregnancy test I would look like I had my life together
I hooked up with a guy named Quan.. I literally hit the Quan
Randomize
