Hey dude. Went to the hospital. Call me when you get up
even after i explained my bobby knight costume the bartender still kicked me out for throwing the chair
I'm buying a chandelier at walmart. WHO'S CLASSY NOW, BITCHES.
Why is your vibrator in the fridge?
I'm testing sex in Alaska before I go there.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i just remembered last night waiting for you to pick me up wearing my bra on my head to protect me from the rain
seriously, i never want to drink Robitussin again. her face was melting as i tried to convince her i wasnt high and i probably would have fucked ray. his parents thought i was a sweet charming lesbian.
This is why you are not allowed out in public.
Mom got high last night and started crying because she feels bad for Paula Deen. This is my family.
He woke up, yelled "RALLY!" and then puked in my glove compartment
So I'll be starting a scrapbook from all the mugshots of the guys I've slept with
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
What exactly is it about Doctor Who thigh high socks with a matching shirt that says "take me I'm yours!"
He just ate a tooth whitening strip...
Then you guys just all showered together...?
thats all i want out of life, to get high and watch weiner dog races
Happy 20th birthday! I hope you like anxiety and having your debit card declined at McDonald's!
Dude... this pee is not alleged
YOU SAT ON MY LAP!
Wuddup pee lap
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