And God said, "Let there be Twilight," and it was so.
I should injure you considerably.
I'm at a job interview and I smoked a little before I came. I thought it would make me less nervous. Boy was I wrong.
HAH. HARRY POTTER CASUAL CONVO HAS BEEN EXTENDED TO DISCUSSING WEATHER. SO PRO
just fed a duck at the lake a weed brownie. it hasnt moved in 20 minutes.
i can't remember the last friday i didn't spend in the foetal position
Weird question, would you want to do fetish porn? you get paid.
How do you get mayonnaise out of... well jesus it's everywhere, let's start with carpets
tried to order jimmy johns from the ER last night, the nurses did nottt approve
I just smoked my last bit of kief with a grill lighter. This is what crackheads must feel like.
I woke up this morning covered in blood and peanut butter. I am now safe from vampires with nut allergies.
If the cops knock on your door and ask if you saw anyone throw an orange out the window I was never there.
Okay. How did someone manage to piss on TOP of a urinal? What giant is roaming around with a prick five feet from the ground?
the bruises from climbing out of the window last night make sitting at my desk impossible. legit excuse to not study right?
Just watched my first Christmas porn of the year. Def have the spirit now
Just took acid. Wish me luck.
I worked out twice today and you're dropping acid. My life sucks.
Randomize