I want to stick my p in your. b.
life lesson #1: a fart during an awkward silence between 2 strangers doesnt make it less awkward.
When the phrase "Wow your huge" came out of her mouth I knew it was gonna be a good night.
Something growled at me in your dark backyard last nt. Hoping it was my landwalking laser sharks and not Andy.
just upgraded from jello shots to jello bowls blacking out just got that much more delicious
Girls only wine night turned into a sloppy drunk lesbian orgy again
you wouldn't stop saying "oil can" in the tin man voice until I gave you back your flask
Great. My funeral dress now smells of smoke and disappointing sex.
Lmao. We just snorted some mystery powder uriah found packged up in my car, that i know has been in there almost a year... Its adventure time.
Gave up on finding an ashtray.... just started flicking it in my purse.
I need to have sex. It's becoming like a matter of public safety.
btw my frat has a search out for you. the "girl who threw up in the middle of the party" but it was on some fat girls. so thank you.
It is not a successful senior year unless you show up to campus without pants at least once, right?
I appreciate your acceptance of my lack of morals
I don't even care if you were high. The fact that I've been begging for us to have those cinnamon rolls for months and you didn't even save me one is not ok.
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