I just googled "whats above a trillion", thats how busy I am at work.
I don't know how to tell my mom that I'm not sober enough to drive to the dentist...
The guy i fucked last week got done first on the test in my 900 person class. If im pregnant at least it will be smart.
So just to get a feel for things...how prone are you to male Amish strippers...
He just asked if I would make his black snake moan. Dating basketball players is not worth the glory
Yeah. she rolled up to the party on a unicycle then peed in the bushes. TA of the year.
He literally sends me dick pictures, EVERY DAY. SEVERAL DIFFERENT ANGLES ..it's like I GET THE POINT.
hotdog in my bra and i still managed to score. Got a bit freaked when he tried to eat it though. I paid 3 bucks for that fucking hotdog.
This girl braided my pubes while i was asleep. Now i cant get them undone.
Sorry man, but I'd rather do drugs with strangers than watch sports with you. It's not personal, drugs always beat sports.
Are we at that point yet where I can just say "I want you to sit on my face"? If not, want to go out for "drinks"?
Come to this bar
But I'm full of food.
MAKE ME FULL OF YOUR DICK
I should stop using "Braveheart would do it" as a basis for decision making...
raging hangover at work with a lunchable dreaming of the sex ill never have. my life is perfect.
he told me I was hypnotizing him with my mouth so I guess I do give good head
Randomize
