dats a huuuuuge bitch!
who is this????
The Shake Weight not only toned my arms but significantly improved my hand job form and efficiency.
I still can't figure out why that's not in the commercial.
If there's ever a time when I've matured to the point that I don't want to look at camera-phone-titties, go ahead and bury me in a shallow grave by the railroad tracks.
i need to know the scientific term for a guy's taint so i can explain what i did last night.
it wasn't THAT bad but he definitely called his dick an asshole and said sorry to my vagina
Hungover snowboarding. Puked off the lift and traumatized a group lesson for kids. Crash course on adulthood.
He said he wanted to have butt sex with me and curl up with me after and just be near me. Then he passed out.
Then he shook the next streetlight but this one broke and fell over. He told me, "This is the part where we run."
its gotten to the point where if her hand isn't on my butt i think we're in a fight
Dude get here. I just re-invented nachos. For real though. They werent real before right now
I said his dick tasted like a Hawaiian Sweet Roll. And then I yelled MAHALO.
I was at a crossroads, dude. Like, do I wanna eat chicken McNuggets or talk about my feelings?
Write this down so you can tell me in the morning. "That bartender needs to be in my mouth."
It’s a good thing I’m the only one in the office today. My boy toy stopped by and now there is jiz all over my desk and couch
I just found two ugly toothless rednecks fucking in the woods in my backyard. The man shouted at me close the door your letting the stank out which made no sense to me cuz we where outside. Whatever. just another Monday in the Northwoods.
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