I guess so. I don't really give a fuck. I think I'm going to jerk off really loudly tonight just to keep them on their toes
Next time, showing us his dick should be his entry fee into your house.
my professor saw me buying beer for the super bowl and said go patriots. thats how i know im getting an A in his class.
Most of the bar is playing trivia I'm playing destroy a relationship in twenty questions
you started petting my head and said "there there, majestical unicorn. it won't be long before we get you back to neverland."
I told her I was going to masterbate myself into a coma... We have another date on Thursday.
He's far too busy staring into my soul to touch my tits.
So the 25yr old smokeshow I fucked last night said "Prepare to be disappointed" as he put the condom on. I was. 40 is bullshit.
just had a woman ask me to donate my eggs so that her baby could look like me. don't know whether to get a restraining order or be flattered. thoughts?
Totally just got spotted hitting the bowl by someone else hitting a bowl. We gave each other a head nod
You ripped the leaves off the top of a pineapple then rubbed the rough skin part all over your face saying "this is how you mate with other species"
I think I left my bra and my crocs in your room
Sorry I missed your birthday party. I caught a dick and rode it to O-Town
I told him he had to put his dick inside of me at approx 1159 to ensure it was birthday sex. i was 19 when he entered me.. came out 20. winning.
lord you gonna make me abandon my soup for tasteful catboy nudes
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