mom just said that her bf is good in bed. fml.
i am watching a movie about a vagina with teeth and then you sent that to me while im eating sushi.
why did i wake up to an event notice that says "Shit Just Got Real"?
So, I just pissed in her shampoo bottle. Hope she enjoys a late golden shower from me.
So I've been thinking a lot since she told me she's prego. But what I want to know is why my voice of reason sounds like Thomas fucking Jane!?
It's sad because pictures are supposed to say a thousand words, and theirs just say 'fat'
about to get into a hot tub with three cops. this cant go well
Do you think she's aware of my deep hatred or should I set her hair on fire in her sleep?
My overnight senior got drunk and hooked up with Kaylee on Sunday. I checked Facebook and he already put down his deposit for next year. This school should pay me a commission.
Security said no more parties of this kind. To me that translates to Theme party this weekend.
Im not spending 10 to get hit on by potential transexuals even if they are cuter than most of the girls I dated.
Just slept with a female bodybuilder. not cute. but it was like fucking hulk hogan with a twat. Beastly.
im so disgusted with myself. funny thing was i lasted 15 seconds. she benches 325
If a handjob meant commitment I would literally touch zero dicks
I think I'm at a stage of my life where I subconsciously purposefully fuck everything up just to see if I can find a way out of it.
Captain and coke. And it's not drinking alone cuz i have a dog
Apparently she hired a private investigator when he took out a restraining order on her. So the answer is no, I didn't hit it.
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