Sweetheart, you've always been a horrid bitch...
It took him longer to undo my bra than he lasted..
She looked like cheddar but tasted like limburger...
its not stalking. its research.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
a man that wears gold spandex underwear and party boys other people is a man after my own heart.
Come 10 years my vagina won't look like this. I must cherish it
You came on your own forehead. Just wanted to remind you that.
I miss your penis. And I totally say this as a friend. I just miss it because it's great. You should be very proud of it.
today i learned why jack sparrow loved rum so fucking much
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I made him hve sex with me in the elevator so that I could put my finger down in never have I ever.
Jared is "trying to bite a strangers hat off" drunk. Oh, and that stranger is a girl at a table of 5 guys, one girl.
Cockoligist
Yes, one may refer to me as that.
I should make business cards.
Ugh contemplating vodka and chocolate protein powder as this Capri sun and vodka isn't really cutting it
He may not be fully over his current wife yet. But wait until I show him my tits in his office at the end of the day tonight.
Stop confusing me with every girl you know that doesn't like sex.
Randomize