At least make sure they are 18
Why
Wow, this guy is harder to get rid of than gum in pubic hair
there was a guy here who managed to get his head stuck in a fishbowl. no, I don't fuckin know how
You know how i spent all of black friday on the plane? Well guess who's getting a x-mas gift from skymall?!!??
Just turned my microbiology homework into a drinking game. The words are getting blurry but I think we're really bonding.
Oh well shit happens. This is my not worried face. This is also my still decently drunk face.
What's the appropriate I've been inside you but we're not technically dating valentines present?
My mouth taste like pussy and my dad noticed. Hahahaha
You better fucking tell me or I'm turning blow job week into go fuck yourself week.
SEX BINGO!
Canadian or clown?
He went down on me to the national anthem being sung by Jordan sparks. It was very patriotic of him
My potted cactus died. I am literally less nurturing than the desert.
I just took a plan B pill with my preworkout. That's the level I'm on today.
Just learned that the cute guy I've been flirting with at the beach this whole time is actually an inmate working in the community instead of being in prison.. My life is unreal
I would let him fuck me right here in this laundromat. Praise Satan.
Randomize
