have you ever noticed that homeless people never have acne. suck it proactive
I can't belive they dont sell booze Sunday mornings. I mean some of us have to work
But sometimes ur dick treats me better than u do
Katy Perry is on a Proactiv commercial. That "I kissed a girl" shit is so much less hot now.
i dont think the girl sending me nudes is qualified to pass judgement on me
You know, I never expected to find myself with a roommate who I'd have to ask not to have sex while I'm in the room. And yet, here we are.
Look if you're not going to be mine and take care of my needs, I'm going to fuck your sisters.
We're gonna have horrible, horrible babies.
Walked into a bathroom stall to pop an addy for my three back-to-back finals today. Felt like Clark Kent walking into a phonebooth.
Now I'm ashamed that I wore a bra
I'll pass on that plan. The lack of my penis in new vaginas is no where on the itinerary.
Drunk Karaoke resulted in only 8 injuries this time, so there is some improvement.
Getting a blow job while breaking up with my gf helps cope with the pain... Kinda weird her best friend is giving me the BJ
He's nice to look at and knows the difference between your and you're. I win.
if he becomes president of the united states, I will tell EVERYONE that i took his virginity.
Randomize
