Its only 8 and she is already passed out
Perfect here is wht u do. Gently slip your index middle and ring finger into her butt hole but gently u dont wnt to wake her..let me know when ur ready for step 2
i was like a deer caught in headlights with its coke-dick hanging out
Using pokemon references during sexual acts is always a good idea.
I had a party to get rid of booze. Woke up with even more. Will do this till I can open a liquor store
He is drunk texting me begging me not to tell my mom. Pretty sure he is about to offer me sexual favors for keeping my mouth shut. I love being the boss's daughter.
Yea. I think between making the bride puke, feeling up the maid of honor, and sleeping with a bridesmaid. I did my part.
I am so 35 right now. Listening to REM, drinking red wine, and crying over an article about ecstasy in oprah magazine.
He wanted to take a picture with our pizza to show his mom that I was pretty but more importantly that he practices in "sober" activities
The last thing I want is a chocolate mold of my cock competing with my real cock for time spent in your mouth
We played alot of beer pong and ventured into the woods with tiki torches
How many strippers in the world do you think have had a debate with someone about the NRA?
Rule #36, branched off rule 4: Dave stays on a leash in crazy settings. It keeps him good and gets you laid.
So essentially he's like a puppy you can bring to a bar? Retractable leash or chain then?
I hate being on my period . Did you know that by the time I'm 30 I would've wasted 1,176 days of my life I could've had sex but couldn't bc I was on my period.
you said you didn't feel like drinking anymore so you mixed vodka with your applesauce and ate it
What's a really polite way of saying "you have gravely overestimated the value of your vagina?"
Randomize
