dude, that girl smelled worse than the great depression.
Why does lindsey know I was naked in the kitchen?
I wish I could just thrust my cock straight into her new relationship.
Last night I woke up and the national rep of his frat was sucking my toe.
I'm going to sing sad and lonely Barbra Streisand songs at the top of my lungs if you don't get here soon
I found out his moms name, maiden name, profession, and office location, his dads name and profession, his home phone, picture of their house, all of his work profiles, and the cost of their house. All I'm trying to do is find his damn twitter
i sent my dealer a picture of the money i would pay him. i also told him i would pay him in cheez-its if he would prefer that.
All I remember is while we were making out M.A.A.D City came on so I pushed him off of me so I could rap along.
And as drunk as I was I was able to show my mom how to make text italicized in Microsoft word
I was just thinking about if my bath water turned to jello and got a little freaked out
What happened?
New Orleans
Every time
Hey can you send me a pic of your breast with a peace sign in the photo? I'm trying to win a scavenger hunt contest. Thanks so much
I've decided if you aren't here in fifteen minutes I'm leaving you for Mario the 75 year old Colombian bartender.
I just smoked weed out of a tomahawk, then chased an armadillo with said tomahawk, I love my life.
Lunch?
Massage?
Spanking with handcuffs?
Randomize