He saved me in his phone as Easy Jen. Should I be offended?
I wouldn't worry about it. He has me as "Sex Puppet."
was i over the top when i said that i wished they made v-neck pants to her?
Chris' response to jim throwing up was taking off his shirt and saying WHO WANTS A BONER
Eberyones makin fun of me cuz I found a snail and caught him and put him in a bocks for u
I wish the ER had shaved that part of my head. It would be easier to show people my staples at the bar.
I can't be 100% sure of this but I think tonight was the first time I told a middle aged woman holding a baby to go fuck herself
She tried to beat the waitress over the head with a bread stick because one of her martini olives was missing a pimento. All while screaming "IT'S GAMEDAY BITCH"
Olive Garden will never be the same.
There should be an open time period where you show each other your goods and it's totally socially acceptable to bail.
I wholeheartedly concur
He was respectful of both me and my One Direction calendar.
Well I walked the wrong way for a little bit and I don't remember if I fell asleep or not but I definitely laid down under the over pass for a while
You know you're hung over when the glare from the cream cheese on your bagel is just too bright...
Can't tell if waking up covered in easy mac is the sign of an amazing or terrible night
Yeah we fucked. I ran into her the next day, I had to pick up the girl scout cookies I ordered from her boyfriends kids.
the girl next to me was drawing sonic the hedgehog on her exam what the fuck
godspeed
Accidentally drunk dialed my mom last night. Started the conversation with "Where you at girl?"
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