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She was so loose she sounded like a jar of salsa. I didn't know that was even possible.
Watching Argentina vs Germany during a wedding on an iPhone. Thank you Steve Jobs.
I am highly attracted to the men and that's all i can say. I do not clap and make noises but i do turn to the side and say how i'd do incredible things to them if given the chance
I don't have the urge to be a home-wrecker with these two. I think I've grown, don't you?
Just saw a field sobriety test being administered at 730 am, I now know I do not have a drinking problem
Our Icelandic basketball player brought cocaine and rachael is screaming that he should do lines off her stomach. It's that kind of party
Unless you have figured out how to blow me through the phone don't drunk dial me.
Clearly my hormones are sending beaming lights to every penis in the area
My puffy vagina and I are on the way to the doctor to see what your mutant penis did to us THANKS A LOT
Let me tell you the story of bicurious george
Man, I meant to go dancing, but accidentally took mushrooms and just threw the frisbee in the park
Surprise ending
I hope you get eaten by satanic starfish.
You don't have issues. You're a consenting adult having sex at work. Go you.
She told me the only rule was that I couldn't cum on her Batman blanket.
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