The dr is doing well, he randomly asked if I was bi
You never realize just how much you have to be thankful for until you almost shit yourself in a Target.
i failed horribly. studying for that final was as pointless as Vinnie is to Jersey Shore
she called me a fuckfaceshitdick. not that's creative. it sounds like a crayola crayon, preferrably an orange-brown shade.
idk whats worse playing power hour to yourself, or the fact that you were having fun while doing it
all i could think about while he was eating me out was how pretty his eyelashes were
I just folded my boss's lingerie. I need a drink and a raise
I don't understand why you're so excited, it's my vagina not yours.
I'm pretty sure I just came a kidney stone..
So if I run into you on the street, I'm supposed to just stop drop and suck your dick?
Was I trying to make a threesome happen again?!
Yep
I need to stop doing that, Im gonna get punched in the face
he's such a nice guy...he deserves a bigger dick.
if he becomes president of the united states, I will tell EVERYONE that i took his virginity.
I called him the wrong name all night, yet I still got a ride home from the party and hooked up with the guy. I'm irresistible.
Mom just walked in on a bj. IT'S WHATEVER.
Randomize
