I ahte it when I peed a little on my shews. I got a litll bit on the automen in your room too.:/
Tracy!! I don't have an ottoman in my room.
Ohhh....do you have a dog shaped liek un automan?
guy picked up a cops taser, thing shot him in the neck, he went down and pissed himself, cop started laughing and hasnt called an ambulance.
The best revenge is premature balding
last night we were having sex and i didn't care if i got off. i was just holding up my hand behind his head so i could look at my new ring. i think he knew.
Well, i'm not sure how that works so i wish both you and your vagina luck on your voyage.
and then the entire party sang the national anthem a capella around the keg.
theres still like 7 beers in the gutter from the roof party we had last night. i dont know how we got up there. but we need to get those beers down.
Today's forecast is horny with strong chance of booty calls. Low of Craigslist cruising, and a high of climaxing in a stranger's bed.
doing an easter egg hunt in a liquor store right now. i feel so adult
Vom Wallet is no more. We now boldly enter a responsible, adult era where we will not throw up liquor onto ourselves.
Can I tell you that I just incorporated the spice girls in my sexting and you not judge me
please come back they are interrogating me about masturbation
he told me he wanted me to go see his cat. apparently i was more interested in playing with his cat then having sex.
I had such a bad bruise on my knees from blowing him so much, he asked if he could sign it...
Tanner. All u drink. 10 bckaa. Locked in Porto potty outside. Constructed area. Main strrrreeeett. Fuck. Help. Pleese
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