IM SAVING ALL MY LOVE FOR YOU
I don't want it.
Ps I don't think it counts as being open minded if you didn't know he was missing a leg until you had already started making out.
Petting the cat and listening to "you've got a friend". This is why I smoke weed. To make sense of situations like this.
Ha ha. You should see the things I'm doing to my body at Bob Evans.
Stop making Mac and cheese and sit on his face. FINISH HIM
He tried to tell me that he could handle his liquor better than "all the bitches in this town." AS HE THREW UP. ALL. OVER.
I hope one day I make out with someone in a taco truck :(
I'm glad I inspire you to reach for the stars
Or a taco
I've never heard "I will drown your mother in vanilla pudding" as an insult before, and then last night happened.
I can't tell if I'm still on the hangover from last night, or if I'm experiencing the one from tomorrow, because it was so powerful that it actually traveled back through time...
Can you please explain to me why there are 7 bags of tacos in my bed?
Why are there four guys spooning on the living room floor?
They're still there? Shit. They were supposed to leave after they hugged it out.
At the light, his mom pulled up next to us while I was giving him road head. He forgot to tell me she was meeting us at the movie. So long story short, I convinced her I drove myself, pick me up in 20.
I was really surprised he asked for my number the next morning..... and my name.
I am mentally ready for anal.
Setting myself up for trouble? Yes. But getting laid is a lot more important at this time.
Randomize
