if another girl says "im usually cleaner down there" I'm just going to shoot myself
so my class lasted 15 minutes this morning because this kid puked all over himself..only at radford
dude, she masturbates with a ken doll.
He gave me an orgasm with his left hand...and he's right handed. Of course he's a keeper.
I like yr title more along "the hot Russian I have sex with."
I woke up using a pile of socks as a pillow. I think theyre clean so thats a plus.
one of the RAs is here. he told me his name is optimus prime and then took his shirt off and fell down
That sad moment when you flush your Molly down the toilet at the airport & watch your vacation slowly end..
im in the library and there's this guy on a computer just staring at a google image of beer. finals week is rough.
New drinking game: Drink while you Drink. I'll explain the rules when I see you, needless to say, it's not difficult. Unless you enjoy sobriety, humanity and life. Bestest.
I feel you. We can get adjoining rooms. It'll be like Disney world, but with drugs and ivs instead of roller coasters and Mickey Mouse.
Which is way cooler
I gave him a handjob in the uber car. Life is really spiraling downwards.
I asked him to help me break in the space ship aka my bed.
I didn't really break out of the friend zone, as much as I blasted the doors off with high explosives and rode through on a grizzly bear...
He had me sit on his face until I begged him to stop, then held me there 5 minutes longer. I rested my head on his chest, told him I needed time to recover....and slept for 6 hours. By the time I woke, he was already at work. I just sent him a countdown times until his shift is over.
Randomize
