come over anyways, right now, right this second
it can be a super quick quicky, then you can go back to studying
wow, that sounds SO fun, please stop enticing me with premature ejaculation
every time I hook up with him I think about the fact that penicillin was a mistake too... and look how well that turned out. It makes me feel just a little bit better.
Apparently when he woke up I was tripping my face off. Everytime the cat meowed I would meow back. This went on for several hours.
Let's just be mature adults about last night and never speak of it again.
Hypothetical question: If I threw up in the dishwasher do I clean it up or just turn it on? :(
Now go wash the fat girl off your hands.
How is it possible that i have sex with a guy and he makes YOU breakfast
she gave me a blowjob during our lunchbreak and expected me not to tell people
No way. Every time you have sex with him you'll end up staring into those eagle eyes and stop mid-orgasm.
I think I should start a match.com profile and put "robe lounging" as my only hobby
I'm about to order this penis-casting kit so text me within 5 mins if you're not down
Hey you're my best friend, I'm sorry I picked my vagina over my heart last night.
Sorry, that was mean and I didn't mean it. I'm just mad at condoms
So basically he is jobless, a potential serial killer, and has poor taste in music? We simply don't have time for that.
It's always appealing to be able to say to someone "I banged your mom"
Randomize
