I met the nicest Tranny last night. He/She loves Cheetos.
If I were a hot girl. I'd whore around, I'd be awesome.
my mom just asked me about sexting and if I have ever sent a naked picture to anyone. i fucking hate fox news.
You know that it's no longer pregaming if you don't go anywhere, right? That's just drinking alone.
no. i just ate a whole thing of hot dogs. me and regret are sleepng alone tonigh.
You may have noticed the broken smoke detector and melted carpet. We may have accidentally lit a ping pong ball on fire...I'm sorry, but we did our best.
Oh wait looks like my cousin is getting deported THERE'S HOPE FOR THIS CHRISTMAS YET
At orientation, some girl is asking, loudly, where she can get weed. Everyone looks discussed but are paying very close attention to people's answers.
well i mean she can't stop a weed based friendship...its like a trying to stop a bomb or a really fast train...
I think my sunburn makes my ass look bigger
Two run-ins with cops/park rangers tonight and now I'm just wandering around high and shirtless
Sacramento doesn't deserve you
I need Mexican food. Like, I'd take it through a needle at this point. It's totally worth the track marks.
Have you seen him ? Seriously. No one is that straight.
G&T. Gin and tonic. GIN AND TONIC. GIN AND TONIC AND FUCKING LIME
You’re going to be a doctor, and I’m going to be a trophy wife. We both have goals
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