Raging hang over. 6AM finish. Shat on a bag of trash in an alley. D L that last bit.
is it bad that i think of my life in terms of the sims? like when i'm hitting it off with someone, i really wish a plus sign would appear above my head. and when i throw up from drinking way too much, a minus sign.
This girl just stopped in the middle of a sentence because of my blue eyes. She said she got lost in them. I am laying pipe tonight.
I woke up in her bed, she woke up in mine. Apparently there was a miscommunication after the 8th jager bomb.
I flossed his teeth and then we had sex in the bathroom. It just seemed like a good idea.
you 2 were alone in the living room and the dog walked in and you started yelling what are all these people doing in here
I bought left over pizza from a guy on Craigslist.
Ummm so I'm at the hospital and just heard some guy get tazed......twice.
Once again being low on toilet paper is forcing us into another round of our favorite game - toilet paper roulette - where there can only be 1 winner. Maybe.
I was figuring I'd break up with her after work, but before Taco Tuesday
Im so glad I make morally wrong decisions. It's like the best worst thing I've ever done.
in a meeting in my bathtub while predrinkin for tonight. technology.
I wish I could send you one of those donuts I had. Like teleport it to you. Because it would change your life
I'm not complaining, but why is it that every time I hang out with you I come home with random injuries and random girls?
I am listening to my ipod while i puke, this is most entertaining hangover i have ever had.
Randomize
