yo my bday is less then one week away. hope youve found another annoying candian i can lick dairy products off of. also sorry about your loss
He yelled GOOOOAAAALLL when he came.
I wish I had my old roomstes number so I could send him pictures from lastnight... I had a blast banging his "true love" now that I think about it we're even don't worry about that gas bill you didn't pay. Ur girl worked it off!
half the nation just spent an hour watching a balloon fly around. we are officially the dumbest fucking country.
you tried to tell me that ice cream had no calories because they were "frozen"
Normal people don't sit around and watch Degrassi for twelve hours...
FUCK YOU.
She had a group on her phone called "great fucks". I was in it. It's almost like making the forbes list
Found our threesome girl. She says I'm pretty. She doesn't know I'm pregnant. Yet. Think we can pull it off?
I can't find the keys to get out of my front door, there are random socks in my bicycle basket and I can see a plastic handle of cheap vodka sitting on my porch. oh, and my head just broke u with me.
HE IS COURTING ME WITH CHINESE FOOD AND IT IS WORKING.
Is it some european holiday today? We both woke up to find loaves of bread in our rooms...
I feel like I shouldn't have to explain to you why giving your cat weed was a bad idea.
People have been asking me if I'm going to the reunion lately. It occurs to me that everyone wants me there to feel that much better about themselves.
I was doing karaoke to "baby got back" and apologizing for being white at the same time.
Nahh no judgin. Compliments to the balls are always heartfelt
Randomize
