Just found out you can rent the rollerena for 100 bucks and you can bring your own beer... when are you free this week?
she told me i should dip my dick in chocolate and then let her blow me since it was her 2 favorite things. weird or my new valentine for this year?
Somehow I managed to make my Dunkin Donuts uniform look slutty. And I'm not even wearing hoops.
I just woke up at my desk with "To Whommmmmmmmm" typed on a letter. I have no memory of waking up, getting dressed or driving in.
Being a slut is okay if you're being a polite slut, right?
We're in the kiddy pool eating marshmellows and drinking wine out of a box. Please dress casual.
One of the annoying girls in my 7 AM class showed up drunk for her 21st birthday and just auctioned off her fake ID.
I just ate cottage cheese and went to the gym at 6 this morning...the things i'll do because I might get naked in front of a new boy
you got in a fight with your imaginary friend last night when he didn't catch you after a surprise trust fall
Our first time hooking up was on New Years and we've managed to hook up every holiday since, I'm hoping this lasts until 2016 just to fulfill my American Holiday sex fantasy I never knew I had
that was the most beautifully crafted sentence ive ever read that involved the phrase "genitals or whatever"
That's like a fucking falcon or some shit. I don't know birds but I know that is not a bird you fuck with.
Black magic does not go near my vagina, it's a rule
lol hangovers are for mortals.
i really didnt think i was that drunk last night but the txts from unknwn #s that say i like your lace panties are def telling me otherwise
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