So I just went home and made my own spanx by cutting the legs off of a pair of nylons. I'm either a genius or missed my calling to live in a trailer park.
Hey when you come over to pick me up in the mornin bring a camera. This is going to be legendary. Don't knock.... They might cover up
pedialite and red bull = repair kit
and yes, the jail cell in Citi Field does have a big Mets symbol in it
we all know badassery is carried on the XX chromosome
Do you know many girls there are in gay bars waiting for me to do coke off their tits? A lot.
his grandma walked in on us. twice. and he was truly fucking surprised when i put my pants back on.
She is a social worker. An actual good person trying to save the world. I feel like every time I give her an orgasm God wipes a little smudge off of my shit list.
Don't let the fact that shes seen my penis discourage you
I am expending an amazing amount of energy to not throw up right now
also, just kill me. literally hit me with a vehicle, or an aircraft, something that will ultimately make me forget tonight.
It's like god made him fantastic at oral to make up for what his mouth does the rest of the time.
that's all we do, eat and hve sex, eat and have sex. he thinks it's bad and that we need to talk more or whatever but I'm just not seeing the problem...
Don't worry, I'm sure your thrusting skills are on point.
Ok. You have started something that can only end with a picture of the inside of my butthole. It may happen today or next year, but it's on my agenda.
Randomize
