I always wonder when I meet a guy from online if he needs a moment to mentally register and accept the size of my ass. maybe ill wear a dress.
You know you're wathing too much reality TV when you start adding commentary to every day life.
its like playing clue every morning after we party. she did him in the kitchen with..oh god.
End of the semester and I banged 14 freshman. I'm like my own welcome to college orientation guide.
he drank a monster margarita at dinner. had to ask me if it was dollars or minutes that ended in 60.
No amount of marijuana is enough to justify blood on my ceiling
literally hosing herself off in my back yard with the hose. i offered her the shower but she refused. that drunk.
Even the bar was yelling boobs, so of course the shirt came off
That's not your dick yours is smaller. Nice try.
Wait why do you have a pic of someone else's dick in your phone?
lost her for two hours. she was banging a russian guy in her car in the parking lot. he told her she was majestic.
tom claimed she had a star tattooed around her buttonhole. i am not prepared for this era of skankyness
Wanna get drunk and play candy land? If so you are 2 steps behind.
I'm pretty sure he sprained my clit...
Sorry didnt text you yesterday. had to put restraining order on my ex.
it will be a surprise...all I can say is stripper clown.
Randomize
