I hope I'm pregnant just to spite you.
I had a dream last night that I was the one that killed Biggie
My number went up to seventeen today. I forgot to add my random hookup on a sailboat.
the dr. explained that the first big patch is called a herald patch since it's biggest. So his name is Harold the Patch.
Wow. You named your rash.
Our adventure is going to pick up his pipe and weed that he ditched when he got pulled over the other day.
HOT DATE.
he put on The Eye of the Tiger while she was in labor.
I'm more concerned with the fact that he was UNconcerned that live poultry could peck him in the nutsack @ any moment of sex
Yah at one point i was listening to metallica and doing pushups last night. I went thru alot of emotions.
He left his phone. Turns out he;s been sexting with some girls who can't spell. Time to break out the herpes scare.
I'm considering having a threesome with my friend just so I can sleep with his boyfriend and not feel guilty about it.
Wouldn't life be so much easier if you could just walk up to attractive men and say, "Let me bear your children" and it wouldn't be creepy?
Or possibly end in a restraining order?
Hahaha she was way into you and you kept arguing about burritos. It was amazing.
Well he wouldn't kiss me so I made out with a German girl, took a shot with my boss, and I think I sprained my ankle. It was a quiet Sunday for me.
you know it was a good night when you wake up with a medal around your neck
there is definitely a hickey on my left nipple.
Randomize
