the nicest thing hes ever said to me is give me head.......please
he just said he'd buy the porn
its a step up from the last guy
When health care reform is passed, I'm throwing a kegger
You are the reason we need health care reform
The state of Wisconsin is just irresponsible for letting me buy this many fireworks
You really need to tell him that he has a girlfriend. I'm not sure he knows
Ya but I plan to getting arrested more towards the end of summer
Come, dress lightly, bring tequila...
I feel like strippers are like dogs, the more you show you're terrified the faster they come at you.
I'm not really made for random hookups.. i'm like a swan.. i don't wanna have random swan sex. i just wanna have one swan hubby and fly around the world together and eat bread that people throw at us..
Decided in my tanked state last night purchase 2 weeks worth of xanax, so I can guess my way thru this week and finals. Soberly, I decided it would be a great way to test my knowledge of finance.
I knew it was a bad night when the only thing I could remember was you force feeding me tortilla chips as I hugged the tire of my car and begged to have my stomach pumped.
Also I would love to pregame at your place if I weren't stuck at mine drinking laxatives
I mean, if you want to light yourself on fire for maximum accuracy, far be it from me to stop you
DO NOT PREHEAT THE OVEN THIS MORNING! WE STARTED USING IT AS A WINE STASH AROUND MIDNIGHT.
No, Ethan, handcuffs and friendship bracelets are not "basically" the same thing.
Randomize
