I love college. Only here at ten in the morning can you hear "Man, hot sauce on my pussy was my worst idea in a long time." while walking down the hall.
Sorry my moustache came off because I was face first in a layered bucket full of jello shots.
Only the gays. Guy gives me a handjob in the steam, then changes next to me under his towel
Only the gays
I'm supposed to be maturing, but no instead I'll be shitting my pants in Delaware for my 30th.
Hahahaha nah you won't shit your pants - but you will fully try mushrooms.
Guess who just sucked off 1/5 of one direction?
You're just gonna have to make the sacrifice man.
I'm trying to hide in the table.
Me and tommy were trying to figure out why our printer was jammed, found a condom stuck in the paper slot. #collegeprobs
orgasmnado...tomorrow night
That's what I'm talking about
We were kinda loud so his roommate woke up and to make up for it he invited him to a threesome. I can't drink whiskey anymore.
I'm just more comfortable with the bondage
I think my brain has decided it's boycotting life until it can do whatever it wants.
video games take priority over anything else you can offer me.
Hillary said in her victory speech "We're gonna come together". I've got a lib-boner.
I know you're having some issues right now but can we focus on the gangbang?
Fuck you i've put so many pretzels in her shirt
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