that's the type of pussy you go to the bathroom and wack off before you fuck her, just to last longer inside of her!
She rubs her butt on the bed & then she growls..
not exactly restoring sanity, but he is throwing up on the national mall right now
Dude you make losing your phone an art. You left it balancing on a two liter bottle in the kitchen. Wtf
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Uhg.. This isn't fair. I just want to have sex with you until i lose consciousness, wake up and start over... is that so much to ask?
Something's wrong. Everything's on fire. Unless it was like that before. Then everything's alright.
Got in a bar fight defending Prince. Thought you ought to know. He gets his dick sucked cooking eggs for breakfast.
I feel bad for the cleaning lady. All you can smell is latex and Jaegermeister
when the repo soundtrack came on in the middle of us having sex i realized it was about time that i clear out my itunes library
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You were petting your bowl of cocoa puffs and shushing it softly while staring at the mirror
You called me into the kitchen so you could show me that you were peeing in the kitchen sink and then told me to leave bc you couldn't do it with me watching
I FUCKED THE WRONG FRIEND HELP ME
I'm just glad I met someone who probably won't punch you in the face
My moral compass kept pointing to his penis.
As long as it's more "this is where i see an issue" vs "psst.... tiddies" then i have no argument
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