He had personality for days, but cock for only minutes
she was pooping while we were on video chat. new level of love.
Someone is gonna learn how to start an IV in the morning
You just handed me your ATM card and wrote your PIN number on a dollar bill and said "for bail money."
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
WHY DO YOU ALWAYS PUT THE PLUG IN THE SINK BEFORE YOU PUKE IN IT
She liked to slap me in the face while she was on top. All I can say is that big boobs can excuse a lot.
She seriously left me for a guy that likes his own statuses on facebook.....
I'm sitting on my couch eating a bag of marshmallows and watching someone run bare ass down the street. What has happened to my life?
Cleaning naked can be dangerous. Vacuum cord got stuck on my belly button ring...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You need to finger her with the Spock hand sign since she loves Star Trek.
It's 4am & this guy is asleep with his junk still inside me..really rethinking my life
You tried to tip the Uber driver with a meatball sub. Then, when he refused your meatball sub...you demanded he take you to the corner with the hookers. The valet has your keys and water balloons. I'm glad you're only in Chicago for the weekend.
Are you feeling better yet?
I need a nap and a new butthole
Same encounter she body slammed me to the floor and than humped me
U dont jog and buy condoms n bulk
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