Youre a pretentious asshole and im not sure who you think you are. Get the hell over yourself and the self righteous culture snob image because its pretty obnoxious.
I served up a girl her first a2m the other day. You would have been proud.
she called my cock the "semen sword" and then we invented a position called excalibur
Thanks for stranding me with th douchebag award recipients
My grandma put hard boiled eggs on her lasagna. I'm not high enough for this.
She fell down the stairs and hit her head on the concrete. Then she stood up, flashed us and stumbled away. I forgot to get her number..
I've been living off of popsicles and broth.
The walk home from the bar is FAR more shameful in daylight.
I have a question: does pizza dipped in chili sound good or am I just really high?
This is my first time seeing you since your lesbian experience. SO EXCITED!
It's amazing I mean I blew that senator just for him to deny me marriage.... Politics suck and he swallowed!
I woke up to you singing What Makes You Beautiful and trying to blend an avocado with vodka.
I think he may actually care that I call him slampiece instead of his real name. Who knew he had feelings?
MY TITS JUST CAUSED A CAR ACCIDENT ON THE HIGHWAY! i kid you not!! i thinl the giy is actually dead
OMG also, I'm sorry I tased you a lil
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