i just drank a strangers drink off a toilet
i hate this light. i wouldnt even hook up with me in this light
You tried to call the hospital and left a voicemail asking if you could be put on the liver transplant list as a "pre-caution"
I bruise way too easily for the kind of rough sex I want...
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I am trying to figure out how to tell this kid i have a boyfriend in a way that still allows me to smoke free weed
I love you. Happy valentines. Satin Patricks dayyyyyyyyyy. Alreadythrew up. Geeeeerait.
You were a path of destruction, you started with eating half the cake, proceeded by throwing the rest in the sink and dumping water all over it while laughing... then throwing the drunk helmet across the room yelling that you didnt want to wear it... i'd say it was a successful birthday.
He did leave his bud tall boy and 2 choco tacos, so not a total loss.
If it makes you feel any better, I had my finger up some guy's butt today... Dominatrix training, ya know...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I needed 3am water. Not 3am shots of rum.
Somehow his homemade liquor activated memories of my semester abroad three years ago. I ended up yelling random medical advice in German, while my roommates played dress-up with the cat stoned out of their minds. I consequently gave up on dating. Back in the ONS game.
Well we can add this to the list of 'where the hell did that bruise come from?'
So he has moved up to a stage 5 clinger...Surprised he didn't try to lure you into bed with tacos, like he did last time
Yeah... akward. I don't want a round 2
His birthday is on cinco de mayo and he doesn’t drink or like tacos. What a waste.
Sorry. I was preoccupied thinking about penises
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