Dude I wish you were here. I'm innthe back seat and it looks like outer space and everything feels like rice. idk. wtf.
you are the weird ass hat to my lady gaga
I hope whoever gets these locks of love doesn't have a drug test anytime soon
His car is carseat is compatible. I checked while we were banging in the back seat...
there's fuck elsewhere to go, I'll be there with 8 lbs of bronzer on my tits
If you come home soon there's a stripper in the shower. Don't be alarmed
If I have to strap one on and give it to you good, you will not die revirginated. That's friendship.
Yea we just broke up
so do we start sexting now or later?
Jäger goes great with personal crises and receding morals...
Yeah he told me he wanted a serious relationship, but he's posting pictures of his dick on Kik.
He's been watching the World Cup too much because right before he came he screamed "NUT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!" for half a minute. Our landlord is not happy.
And let me tell you, getting your ass waxed is the weirdest fucking experience.
It's something you'd find in the room outside of Ben Carson's sex dungeon
He played with my nipples while singing "How great thou art"
Soooooooo high. David tried to rinse the water droplets out of the sink for 5 minutes
Randomize
