Afterall, it is the real San Francisco treat
'hiiiigh' is saved in my t9 for a reason
woke up this morning with "hah" written on my penis.i was like wtf?? morning wood kicked in and found out what it really said, haNNah.then i remembered.
since when did accompanying a guy to a wedding mean that anal was required that night?
I couldn't walk, so he carried me all the way home; and then I told him that I wasn't drunk enough to fuck him. Poor kid.
We had to put his head at the bottom of the driveway so the puke would run down. Now he's sleeping outside.
so just saw tiger woods pull a page out of his wifes book and hit some kid in the head with a golf club
if your not going to answer your phone this is just going to be an embarrassment tomorrow
Thanks again for allowing my sister to lose her virginity on your bed.
Still dying that you shit outside
Just did body shot off a midget. Pretty good start.
I gave him the white girl "you spilled my psl look" and walked away
Ahha guy saw me buying beer, went "hmmmmm" and nodded his head approvingly. No words exchanged, but he has made his way to my heart haha
Side piece definitely knows about my GF. Said it was sexy when I go commando, then left me pantsless in the club bathroom
I thought I was drunk because I kept grabbing his arm instead of his dick
But then I realized it wasn’t his arm and that I was very lucky
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