we'll penetrate his innocence with our dicks
Girls behind me in the library are trying to outslut each other with stories from last semester. I'm about to set my cock on the table between them and label it "tie breaker"
If fate has that penis in my future.....I'm down.
he put $150 on the cabs dash so 9 of us could pile in and ride 3 blocks to the apartment.
I had to step in when you tried to make it rain baking powder on my sister
You can't just send the picture of my vagina back to me, 2 months after we broke up, and make small talk out of it.
this cock blocking thing really has to end bro...its one thing to tell jen i live with my mom.. its another to cut the brakes on my car..
getting up at 8am to start drinking seemed like a much better idea before I had to wake up at 8am
Haha, how do I word that nicely? "You got me to the edge of no return twice and failed to let me orgasm, therefore you owe me chicken nuggets or hot wings. Your decision"
i asked him to talk to me in french while we fucked and halfway through i caught the word 'lasagna'. turns out he was making his grocery list.....i asked him to keep going.
tbh I think I just dated him for his dogs in the first place.
I think i just made eye contact with his roommate... while doing reverse cowgirl. Yup i have no shamee
Went to bed still wearing my bralette. When I was changing this morning, a Tootsie Roll fell out. I'm definitely living my best life.
She asked me to tell her the three words every girl wants to hear so I whispered "I play hockey" in her ear.
She just texted me saying "come over and eat me out, my vagina smells like honey glazed ham." I know I shouldn't be, but i'm just so curious.
Randomize
