so I'm never txting u again after today...
y?
cuz i don't wanna see it on blogspot :)
ha...too late
Think the blond can even spell "shiksa"?
I woke up this morning wearing my tux shirt and jacket, but no pants.
______ was pissed. My breath tastes like tequila and doritos, and I couldn't get it up.
its a vaginal recession for me, ill take what i can get
I don't want to talk about it but I will say, that was the best two headed $68 blowjob. Ever.
Between the hair pulling and the choking its its more like combat than sex
Sorry I have an "Operation Iraqi Freedom" fantasy
Its 10:23 on a monday morning and im craving jello shots, this is a problem
Like hey, "you just spent $135k to go to a nobody law school to drive a mini van, be a dj, live in a smalllll ass apartment that smells like cats and your girlfriend fucks other guys."
I feel like the way you told me you weren't pregnant was pretty anticlimactic.
Where's Taylor bro?
Never mind found him under the sink
We could put on there: "Drink jager bombs and do stupid shit faster, with more energy!"
I'm not trying to take your husband away from you, but can we have another 3way soon? I'm just desperate for good dick.
And no one can masturbate with the sound of Bernie's voice in the background
He fucked my brains out then fed me cheese and peanut butter. I might be in love.
But we have bathrooms and they dont
Randomize
