Christians are straight up FREAKS
no, there's no challenge. I live a humble lifestyle out of virtue.
You wear Armani Exchange.
Your brother just successfully got half the bar mostly naked
I think they gave out some kind of ugly girl scholarship I don't know about...
so i told him i still liked him. he laughed
well, your crazy. what did you expect?
#1 lesson to be learned from mardi gras this year: lock your car doors or some grimy dude like me might just bang in it and use your backseat as a kleenex
we've got reservations. ask for the eat a bag of dicks table
would you say our friendship is at the "help each other shave animal patterns in each other's pubes" phase?
Oh god. I finally realized why the coked out Stevie wonder was explaining the concept of movember to the McDonalds clerk. Drunk me didn't process that another month comes after Halloween... It's apparently November.
Nothing. Its like my body doesn't know how to function on a Saturday when its not hungover and/or still drunk.
Just got to Evans to buy weed. His mom showed up unannounced. Now the three of us are chillen. Super.
My ex's new gf is pregnant and he is sterile, so 2016 is starting off well.
Also: that bruise on my leg where you left like 3 sets of teeth marks keeps getting run into the corners of desks and shit. And I can't even complain to anyone at work
I don't care. It's wine Wednesday get your gameface on.
Our son just found our secret Sex Dungeon that is no longer hidden in our basement. He brought his Xbox and the TV down there he is currently sitting in the sex swing playing video games. What do I do?
Randomize
