need another drink. this is the easiest way
WHO ATE OUR COOKIES WHAT THE FUCK THOSE WERE GOURMET
We ran out of things to say while we were playing Never Have I Ever so we started playing I Have Done This... Have You?
I won't drink with you again until you promise to not feed me anymore paper bags
But he found my shoe...that at least deserves a handjob.
Rush week is fine, only the t-shirts are white and if it rains, the frat boys in their lawn chairs will be treated to 800 freshmen girls in their first wet tshirt contest.
Welcome to college.
Yeah, surprised you made it on time this morning. Remarkable, considering 2 hours ago you were pretending to be talking window curtains.
I send out my deepest condolences for seeing my ass last night.
You said you were uncomfortable with your body and then you started making whale noises
She got engaged last night. I don't think you should ask her out man.
I think I broke my toilet with my head. There are ceramic pieces everywhere. and I might still be drunk.
THERE'S MORE TO LIFE THAN JUST MISSIONARY
So I'm buying milk, bread, yogurt & lube. Not awkward at all
Basic items
Thanks for driving us home last night. Also, blanket apology for anything I may have said/done. I blacked out sometime near the t-shirt cape incident
Never in my life did I expect to see Eric's mom in a cheerleader outfit along with other women
Randomize
