no, he's only a walking dick if he mans up. right about now he's just a walking transgender.
Minivans at bars can only lead to bad things.
the jolly green giant just puched the pope. halloween is the best.
I'm starting therapy this week.. Taylor Swift music isn't cutting it for me anymore
he thanks me after handjobs.
you found the perfect man.
I was at that stage of drunk where it seemed appropriate to just make out with everyone. As like a greeting.
I hear you
As part of the off-hours team building exercises, I had my new coworkers figure out to push me back to the hotel from the nearby bars in a shopping cart every night for a week.
The Winnie the Pooh costume was great until you got drunk and started yelling at the kids asking for pictures.
Haha. Maybe he's one of those feminine men who fucks like a god then makes you fantastic crepes afterwards
You just referred to a pillow with a stolen bra strapped to it as "she". Let that sink in for a minute.
She has dubbed herself the Pied Piper of Penis and keeps yelling about getting Cocktober started... Will send pix soon
All I've been thinking about for the past 12 hours is sex and SEAWORLD
I just had a spiritual connection with my sweater and did ballet in the hallway. Alone. I'd say we're gonna chalk that up as a win for marijuana and call it a night
Plus my dignity needs a night alone with me.... Oh that's right. I lost it last night
Sad realization: so long as I use this sleep apnea machine, I will never be the little spoon!
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