i wish i could post a picture of his odd shaped penis on facebook and label it "wtf???"
the biggest problem in our relationship is that im team edward and my boyfriend is team jacob
Eating in charleston sc at a seafood place called "hymans". Like normal I had no problem finding it.
So i was told that i peed in the sink, had sex with a pillow and banged on a washer while singing idian chants
Hey thanks again for rolling me that blunt necklace. It was amazing.
Dad just showed up on someone else's golf cart, filled an ice chest with booze and left while yelling "SHINANIGANS!!!!" this is going no where fast.
Youre the drunk baby that everyone wants to take care of.
I sent him an 18 page sext. He's going to have a good morning.
Excuse me while I gouge out my eyes.
In which case my work here is done.
I also woke up in a bed soaked of pee and drunkenly lectured him on the dangers of chewing tobacco... weird night
Woah don't start going all boyfriend on me now, you're here for one thing and one thing only and that's sex, hot shameless sex.
They weren't kidding when they said "Go Army Strong." Best sex I ever had.
We told the cop that we were playing soccer, in flip flops, and 2:30 in the morning. It was raining and i had board shorts on. He bought it, lets go get drunk
I'm literally trapped as the little spoon on a mattress on the floor of an unfinished basement with a professional athlete snoring in my hair
Is it still sex if there's no nudity, no orgasms, but the neighbors bang on the wall and ask you to stop? I've honestly forgotten.
Randomize