i celebrated the independence of our country by dry heaving tequila all morning. so classy. happy 4th.
Had sex with him. My tampon is now in my brain. May need surgery.
I found out that all you need to write a 12 page paper is adderall and twizzlers
he asked me if i wanted "a hit" off his inhaler. its definitely time for a new roommate
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I know it may not be fiscally responsible to pregame fifty cent night, but I'm gonna go ahead and do it anyway.
I feel like i made up for not being able to drink on St Pattys Day, Mardi Gras, and last years Cinco De Mayo. That hungover.
I assume you will show your seat mates your vibrating cock ring.
It was only 12:11 and I needed to make a Pepto Latte and call it a night, I don't remember that being part of my new years resolution.
Im just a social blackout drinker.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The words "me," "sober," and "new years eve" do not go together. Ever.
Just beer bonged tequila, broke into the hotel next door and got chased by security. It's spring break
I just don't wanna be that girl with no ride and no pants
I think we ended 5-7 relationships as well this weekend...so another good stat
How do you teach a grown ass men how to fuck? Why is good sex so hard to find these days?
college girl with braces trying to flirt with you...time to go
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