i just rode the bull and i see vomit in my future.
Asian chick on skype stripping for me. Hold on give few min
So the guy sitting next to me is watching dungeons and dragons on youtube. I didnt realize you could get more pathetic than actually playing the game.
he was fingering the outside of my pants..i knew that was my cue to leave
just tried googling 24 hr taco bell and when i typed "24 hour" it autocompleted with fitness. buzzzz killllll
Guy next to me is looking up how to press his own ecstasy pills. I'm going to befriend him and see where this goes
Let's just say trying to drink my weight in apple pie shots looked better in theory.
I think the Predator is hunting me in my house. If I don't text you later, send Danny Glover. I love you all.
I was chasing disarono with Bacardi and watching ice cube movies. It would have been an epic birthday if I wasn't by myself and actually had some decent friends.. Hint. Asshole.
I did cocaine off my boobs last night. Then I wrote two essays and went on a run. Go me
Okay so how much boob would you consider inappropriate for smart casual?
If so I'm coming over there. There's no way I'm having "hello, how are you" conversations with my neighbors on acid
We decided it was a good idea to go streaking through the campus. Everything was fine until the sprinklers turned on and we realized the keys were in his pocket.
I see more hoeing in ur future
There’s a child, alone, sitting on a picnic table out there, making bird noises
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