She called me Jeff during sex, I just kept going like nothing happened. To think, if I was a woman that would be a problem.
Either allow it in a formal toast or i will drunkenly tell your in-laws while i'm dancing on their table. either way, the truth is coming out
If i spent $300 & took that thing home i would hate myself today.
We really need to check into harvesting part of our liver now
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I wish my head, heart, dick, and nose could just agree on something for once
Since when do you jog?
Since hot shirtless guy that lives across the street jogs
I was unconscious Saturday for like 6 hours after I passed out on the sidewalks of our nation's capital. Thank you America, for bottomless brunch.
tried to suck my ex boyfriends dick last night at a bar... Happy homecoming from me to you
So how does one go about leaving their family vacation to hang out with someone they met on tinder
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Donald Trump looks like someone photoshopped hair onto a dick pic.
Nothing says "Happy New Year" like having to shit into a plastic bag.
No, I'm not a heathen. You two are the heathens, I'm the whore.
Best news I’ve heard all day. Cookies and dick. What more could a girl ask for?
Dad hid the hash somewhere in my room and wont tell me where it is until i clean it. My room is spotless. The hash was on the ceiling fan...
GOOD MORNING! This is your wake up call! Just incase this text wasn't enough, I had sex on your bed last night while you were drunk hitting on my sister. Dan jizzed on your pillow! We rubbed it on both sides! Now get up and go to class!
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