what part of covering your puke with shaving cream seemed like a good idea?
Get out of your relationship and into my pants.
so do the steelers give the refs blowjobs at halftime or after the game?
I'm still amazed at how you managed to puke in every plant on the whole top floor at the mall without a single person noticing and without missing a step.
Hippo gnu deer
That's okay, during storytime I would have to sit on my hands so I wouldn't touch everyone. Explains a lot...
Drunk Tina signed up to be part of the crew team and got a text from the captain telling her there's practice tomorrow. Wtf
Nah nah nah the rules are different on st patty day, drink beer or die. It's like the hunger games but blurrier
she was trying to use her iTranslate app while we were having sex.
I just had the stunning realization that I lost my virginity in a bunk bed.
Props to you. You took the bet seriously. Making out with her for an hour right after she spewed
Maybe he injected his testicle?
I was giving him a blowjob but we had to stop because he started crying when his cat walked in and started staring at us
How bad was it?
Stopped drinking Sunday, hungover on Tuesday bad.
My parents left me the house for the weekend...you know what that means?!
Harry Potter marathon and no pants.
Randomize
