some guy just asked me if water gets in a vag when girls take a bath. WTF. it's not a wind tunnel!
they bet me shots that I couldn't give people piggyback rides around the club just cause I'm 125lbs and a girl...I had a line forming after the third guy.
You claimed your dick was a divining rod, spun in a circle 3 times and walked into the bar you stopped in front of...consequently there was a bikini shoot going on
Ya bro it was wild. Hey, is latex digestible?
We jumped on a random trolley because total strangers offered us free vodka. We're not even on the route map as far as I can tell. I see now how those people died in "Hostel"... we deserve whatever happens to us tonight.
Well on the plus side I have started adding benefiber to my bottle of wine
I need to pack up my vagina and leave. We only do bad things together.
I just remembered something. Did we really all flash the cab driver to get half off?
I feel you. We can get adjoining rooms. It'll be like Disney world, but with drugs and ivs instead of roller coasters and Mickey Mouse.
Which is way cooler
It was all good till you had ppl chasin shots of ciroc with fucking applesauce
There is an unwrapped tampon, a condom, a rubber chicken and a slim Jim currently sitting on our dining room table.
At some point the phrase "I've hit rock bottom" stopped having a meaning and became my general state of life
Do we have to do this party tonight? I'm worried my bed will miss me...
I mean...he danced with his dick still inside of me. What more could a girl ask for?
Tomorrow has nothing to do with the threesome
I am the one with the vagina. I get to call it.
Randomize
