How is your vagina???
Double booked
With your butt?
Totes, candlesticks and all
Yay!!
Me too ba-by. I wanna bite your ear lobes they are so fat.
I like it. Barfy the gin-flavoured Assman
Theres this fat girl in desperate need of the proactive factory in my class and as i watch her shovel food in her face I am struggling to not only keep down my meager lunch but also to stay straight. Eliza Dushku couldnt even get my flacid dick to move
Slurping strawberries throug a straw. It feels like the kool-aid man is coming in my mouth.
I want to meet new people and vomit on their things instead\n
oh sorry. I thought "boat" was code for "penis"
Pretty sure I just puked up sand. And nothing else.
turns out my ex girlfriend has become my most successful wingman. life is fuckin weird sometimes
I'm out of prison. Wanna start a band?
You throw up behind 1 mannequin and it's world war 3 in forever 21
this is honestly why we're friends. we drink tea and plan to do drugs together.
If my plane goes down do me a favor. Break into my house and get the batman costume and swing out of my bedroom.
I don't want to date him...I just want him to cheat on his girlfriend with me.
How is it that I know 4 different bartenders who won't charge me for drinks, but I can't get laid?
Randomize