i just got a Mexican deported. not sure how to feel.
Seriously, let me lead the intervention, my parents did like three with me. I know how it works.
I was hoping we just happened to wake up naked and I hadn't fucked him.... no such luck.
I just found like 5 packs of sparklers. If someone doesn't get set on fire tonight I am retiring from party hosting.
Using the salt from a pretzel bag for tequila shots. Come over.
thanks for being my moral compass. and thanks for not always pointing north so i can be slutty and not feel bad about it.
Well... first you killed the girls goldfish, then you shoved her face in your armpit, made her cry, got kicked out, ate your cigarettes, and passed out in her driveway. Pretty successful night if you ask me
No. I'm wrapped up in my sheets like a burrito. Carry me
If a baby can come out of it, so can four raquetballs.
My poor liver. I drank enough on NYE to sustain an alcohol addiction for the entirety of 2015.
You were making out w/ur brothers coach against a door when someone opened it and you both fell through... Then you continued to make out on the ground
So you completely disappeared from my memory last night at about my 15th Jager bomb. But only you. No one else.
"WHAT IS THIS LESBIAN MADNESS"
they call themselves the foursome.. thats def means they're up for one right?
I woke up and couldn't find her. She had somehow managed to get into the closet and lock herself in. She was crying for her boyfriend. Thirsty Thursday at its finest
Randomize
