Well, I'm a guy so I don't have one, but if its anything like the inside of my nose, yes, vodka would burn.
I'm like a warm blanket that has sex with you
She is a fish and this place is a barrel. I can play this game.
thank you for introducing me to everyone on chat roulette as I was passed out.
Oh I forgot to tell you one of the little boys in my preschool class was wearing a Hooters tank top today.
What? Cold floors are soothing when you have a hangover. How am I supposed to pass that up. Even if I'm at my parents house
Just bought a pack of cigs...gas station guy informed me i took off my underwear and tried to pop a squat by the milk last night...
I only broke up with her because the ex sex is amazing. She will do ANYTHING if i even hint at getting back together
i have one question about last night
if this is about your fridge being filled with hotdogs, sour cream, and PB&J open-faced sandwiches, i can explain
Guess who won a bet and gets to name it Optimus prime if it's a boy
Nevermind. Totally worth it.
you said you would race him to taco bell but you slipped in the parking lot and just laid there, crying
AFTER I licked the bald guys head they told me we weren't playing
My brother didnt wanna sleep with her because she was my friend. Did I miss the memo where we're not supposed to be fucking each others friends? Oh well too late.
He literally said from now on he's always banging chicks with asthma becuas it's such an ego booster
saying im screwed is like saying the titanic took on a little water.
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