you should buy a sheep. A) you get an awesome pet. B) free coat
He's a firefighter, who has his own band. I'm pregnant just thinking about him.
I feel like Tiger Woods should send Jesse James a gift basket or something...
the more i look through evidence of last night, the less i seem to remember.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My costume is made up of 4 inch heels and a firefighter costume I'm borrowing from the dramatic play area of my Pre-K classroom. I told you I could still be slutty on a teacher's salary.
Jerry just sent me this: IOR GHIT ALL THE BUTTIB. Go get him. Now.
My picture of a beer can in a McDonalds cup full of ice got more likes than my relationship with her. Is beer THAT much better than monogamy?
She is currently expressing her joy for "bad to the bone" through interpretive dance...
Seriously? We dated for 2 weeks. TWO. And I've crushed his soul and put out the light in his dark world? What the actual fuck.
Yeah, well. That's what you get for dating a musician.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i just deleted him from my phone. and yes... I did just text you this from less than 20 feet away.
I'm not judging.. I sure as hell am not getting out of my bed to come talk to you about this. but i support your decision
You wanna get laid? Be a female for once and stop bending nails to impress guys.
He keeps telling me he's gonna get me dope for my birthday. 1. HELP ME. 2. HOW IS THAT AN ACCEPTABLE BIRTHDAY PRESENT. Also, please HELP ME.
Odd start to the day - the FBI just showed up at my apartment.
Because I'm currently dying, lacking waffles, and vaguely convinced I'm an eagle
Just puked. First it was bright neon blue then it turned to bright lime green. How does that even happen? And wtf was I drinkin last night?
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