watching hot guy on train scrolling with his blackberry's track ball... o to be that track ball...
Street performer on bourbon st just lifted a sewer top so I could puke down it. I love New Orleans.
shut up i haven't hooked up with anyone since 45 minutes ago
at what point did putting a bag of doritos in the freezer seem like a really good idea?
I'm sorry. We set two Christmas trees on fire. Also the neighbor's yard. Also ours.
Saw a guy in a chef outfit covered in mustard talking jiberish into his phone running across the skywalk.
She wanted to to do it on top of a horse, I can't compete with that
He is so amazingly handsome. I just wanna fuck every shred of decency out of him.
I found ecstasy taped in my armpit... thank you drunk Marissa.
Today, my boyfriend informed me that I look like my dad when I orgasm
new costume idea. paint swatches and a ball gag... I'll be 50 shades of grey.
Justin just used the term "industrial strength colon blow".
she was puking nonstop out of the car window in the rain during our hour long drive back, we got lot of honks
I already tell everyone in my office my bf is at the Naval academy. It slipped one time and I can't go back on it now
The comfort of this onesie is keeping me single
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